Timeless Wisdom: Lessons from My Grandfather on True Fulfillment
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Chapter 1: The Nature of Good and Evil
My grandfather often remarked, “If the good fades, the evil remains.” This simple truth has profound implications. It suggests that fleeting pleasures often lead to long-lasting consequences. The more ephemeral the joy, the harsher the fallout.
As he wisely pointed out, “You exchange a bit of well-being for increasing dependence. You become hooked on the remedy, and every solution that fosters dependency eventually transforms into a problem.” This is a pitfall that many encounter in today's world.
Consider the following modern-day examples: sleep medications that provide mere hours of relief but can lead to years of addiction; entertainment that fails to satisfy, compelling you to bounce from one social media platform to another, consuming endless short videos that generate fleeting bursts of dopamine yet leave you perpetually wanting more; fast food that promises convenience but leaves you hungry again shortly after; and substances that temporarily alleviate emotional pain but jeopardize your health over time.
As my grandfather expressed, “Companies today aim not just to sell, but to cultivate habitual reliance on their products.” He believed that our mistakes stem from love, saying, “Everything we do wrong is rooted in love. The issue is that human beings are flawed and often mistake what is truly good.”
To illustrate this, my grandfather shared, “People desire attractive partners, luxurious homes, and vacations because they believe these will bring happiness. However, they confuse pleasure with true happiness, and they are not the same. Pleasure offers no lasting fulfillment; happiness does.”
When I inquired how we could so easily misinterpret what is beneficial, his response was enlightening.
“The term ‘benefit’ comes from the Latin word beneficium, which means ‘good that is done or received.’ The roots of beneficium are bene (good) and facere (to do). That’s why we pursue material gains instead of spiritual growth; we chase money, possessions, and luxury under the illusion of their goodness. Yet, this is a trap, and we can become possessed by our possessions. Grandson, happiness is intangible, hence it can only be found in the immaterial, not the material.”
How to Avoid the Traps
I then asked my grandfather how we might evade these pitfalls, and he responded, “People often claim they want a good life, but that’s misleading. They desire a life filled with pleasure, hoping their vices won’t lead to their demise. But this is untenable, as everything comes at a cost. A good life, grandson, is not about wanting less but finding satisfaction in what you consume, so that your needs don’t overwhelm you.”
Applying his wisdom, I discovered that:
- A day spent hiking in nature is far more fulfilling than a week of binge-watching Netflix.
- Enjoying a barbecue with friends far surpasses the experience of chatting with strangers online.
- Finding a true partner to turn a house into a home is infinitely more rewarding than a day of casual encounters on dating apps.
So, refrain from indulging in transient comforts that ultimately bind you to unhealthy habits or dependencies. Instead, pursue authentic experiences that don’t amplify the existential void within you.
A virtual hug,
AG
In this video titled "80 Life Lessons My Grandfather Told Me I Could Never Forget (89-Year-Old)," explore invaluable insights that transcend generations and encourage you to seek genuine fulfillment.