Understanding the Misguided Praise for Failure

The phrase "failure is a stepping stone to success" has become a cliché, often overstated and misapplied.

Today, I’m diving into a lengthy discussion about the glorification of repeated failure as a trait worth aspiring to. As software engineers navigating the challenging landscape of our profession, we frequently encounter unsolicited advice from self-proclaimed experts touting their "insights" on achieving success.

Whether they are enticing us to subscribe to their mailing lists for a “free” ebook, promoting AI-generated content from their latest business podcast, or convincing us that their rehashed “life hacks” will revolutionize our lives overnight, it’s mostly the same uninspired content. If anger fuels engagement, then recycled motivational quotes certainly keep the cycle of reposting alive.

It’s easy to spot the insincerity, especially for those of us with some experience or who have spent any time on LinkedIn. The promoters of these ideas often consist of salespeople, marketers, and self-styled "thought leaders" who regurgitate the same tired clichés across platforms like Twitter, Instagram, and LinkedIn.

Even TikTok hosts its share of these influencers—if you’re using that app, you might as well embrace the chaos.

These monotonous mantras include empty motivational phrases, the relentless grind culture, and hollow platitudes about wellness. This morning, I was particularly struck by the sheer volume of content on LinkedIn revolving around the most misused term in corporate jargon: "failure."

First and foremost, no one enjoys failing; it’s an uncomfortable experience. Failure is often seen as a deficiency in knowledge, skill, or experience, and this perception can be humiliating. Society tends to rally against those who don’t conform, which is a significant aspect of modern corporate culture.

Moreover, failing in front of an audience can feel especially disheartening. No one wants to appear inept, including project managers themselves. Additionally, failure often necessitates a repeat attempt at a task, which can be enjoyable in the right context. However, in the typical corporate software engineering environment, tasks are assigned and scrutinized by individuals who often lack a clear understanding of the technical challenges involved.

Chances are, the tasks you’re handed are frustrating, have unrealistic deadlines, and require daily updates in front of your peers, stripping away any sense of well-being or mental health support in the workplace.

This brings us to the troubling trend of motivational quotes urging individuals to "fail often to succeed." Mistakes are indeed part of the learning process, but in many software engineering roles, failure can be embarrassing and detrimental to your career prospects, particularly when it comes time for performance reviews.

Let’s examine a few popular phrases that are often thrown around:

"Fail, fail, and fail again!"

Except when a performance review is imminent or your project manager is pestering you about deadlines.

"Fail Forward!"

I would love to see a so-called thought leader explain this concept to management. Projects are tightly managed, with rigid milestones and inflexible parameters, creating a precarious situation that can collapse at any moment.

"Move Fast and Break Things!"

This is amusing until you realize it applies to expensive test hardware that requires careful handling. Telling someone to run tests without proper checks could lead to disastrous consequences.

"Lean into Failure!"

This is easier said than done, especially when reflecting on a major mishap during a high-pressure moment in the business.

"Risk It to Get the Biscuit!"

This phrase is likely coined by someone with minimal experience in tech, suggesting a reckless approach to software development.

"Iterate, Iterate, Iterate!"

If you find yourself stuck on a failing task, it might be the task itself that’s flawed—not your efforts.

In my experience across various companies, the notion that repeated failure leads to success is a misguided belief perpetuated by those in power. The reality is that consistently failing can lead to job loss rather than accolades for perseverance.

Failure is a natural part of learning, and we strive to avoid repeating our mistakes, but seeking out failure as a methodology is not a viable strategy. We should focus on achieving success from the outset, rather than setting ourselves up for failure.

I don’t step outside hoping to get wet; I actively seek to stay dry. This is just another instance of the so-called thought leaders and motivational speakers trying to sell a narrative that lacks substance.

We must reject these shortcuts to success and think independently.

A personal journey detailing the struggles and lessons learned in software engineering, emphasizing the importance of resilience.

A candid reflection on the challenges faced in the software engineering field over several years, exploring the concept of failure and growth.